For the love of…Love

savonne (4)

Those fables didn’t speak of the wind between her coils.

Nor the kinks that made you squint a little harder because that shine…that shine is moonbeams and sun rays. Illuminated essence gifting warmth on those snow days, a sensational presence. Nothing less. Relinquishing greedy hearts and cold hands insatiable and abreast.

That glow is ineffable as it penetrates. Magnetizing your being you had no inkling that love…love was equivalent to a kill switch. Saving you from the detriment determined to birth you renewed. They never sung hymns of warning solely those foretelling of her glory and the aftermath of a reconstruction.

They did not speak.

Not of the thunder in her eyes or the terrain equipped to match. That causes earthquakes within the foundations you deemed stable because you, you had strengthened your back sifting through bagged sands of time. Disbelief reeking from your bruised pride longing for a cautioned whisper so that you may ready and bleach your white flags.

It’s your reality and you damn sure weren’t prepared. For the masked cracks to turn to ash when she set your world ablaze. Don’t you see? Love…It’s an infinite being. Wailing a laughter so loud it makes your own insides hurt. Crying so many rivers mother nature herself is a representation of devoted gratitude.

Did you ever think you would see the day? Where you would stand in all of your naive conclusions that have since left to rot. I’m willing to make a bet and I’d do so on her shooting stars resting assured in her surety that you didn’t see this coming.

She arrives bearing witness, tested and tried true. Wisdom birthed from the spaces in-between a fusing of what’s attuned. Love is limitless, even. Recognizing that it’s so much to bare all on own, it’s easy to understand why she always feels like a home. When the waves are coming, flowing, thrashing high and then slow.

Love.

Love shows up.

Continuously.

Passionately.

 

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It is nothing but a hopeless illusion that I could ever lose myself.

Sitting here observing the world go by, taking in and filtering out all the madness.

I am, forever, present in it all.

It is only within the moment that I personify and rationalize my musings that I experience pain and detachment. Abandonment and loss, Depression and anxieties, these things becoming fused within my psyche when in reality I am the observer of it all.

I am the pulse and I am the thing that gives life simultaneously. I am outside of the dance of distractions consuming all time so tell me why it is I can’t shake this feeling.

I sit here and I wonder just why it has to be this way. Duality at its finest seeking joy yet remaining estranged.

Why is there this pressure in my chest telling me something is wrong. Leading me away from the moment when I… I am pointing the other way. The way that leads me home, tell me what is this thing that has infiltrated my space.

I do not know, no longer am I filled with care but one thing is for sure and I choose to dwell there.

mermaids

I can no longer push while it pulls nor fight while it eats up all of my will. I can no longer cry more tears for what it seems I need to heal, I can no longer pretend that I am not the thing that is beyond this act and this stage. I will no longer play cat and mouse with the monkey in my brain nor the snake coiled within its husk and a shadow built of shame.

I have realized I can not let it go, so instead I will let it stay…

We will occupy this body. I will no longer disagree nor entertain its beyond warped perception that fear is valid for that is the true danger. In and of itself… and it is danger I should be aware of with no questions arising. Always it is just. It is simply a compass and a knowing I can trust.

When I stop resisting its existence perhaps it’s insistence will quiet. Take heed to my directions and relinquish it’s violence. After all the saying goes “Peace? Be still.” so with that it is known through silence I am filled.

The jury is out, there shall be no more debating. Nothing to eliminate just alignment with my placement. It is right here I can feel that my nature is at ease. Seeing it seeing me and so I know it isn’t me…

 

To Be or Not To Be

Be Strong Don’t Cry

Be unattached to emotions,keep those eyes dry

Boys in to Men, still unable to understand who we are

Taught to believe in another illusion that leaves permanent scars

The collusion goes full circle, attempting to be infinite

Little girls grow to be disillusioned women, relationships are no longer simple, they are intricate

Asking why are men not emotional, as if these men need a trip to the wiz

Then telling him that he is too emotional when he displays what he is

Confusion tightens and strengthen’s it’s grip on men. To be or not to be

To be emotional and alive or to be non-emotional and never consciously free..deadly

Maybe this is how it was always meant to be, disconnected, Does it come Naturally?

Believing that we are so different? Why do you we believe things so faithfully?

Without question? Without doubt?

Will men ever be able to cry on other’s shoulders and not be considered weak? Is there another Route?

A man who isn’t afraid to cry and express? Can we stereotype strength?

Too emotional are never the words a strong man wants to hear after you’ve been enjoying his length.

Girth, forever expanding around the topic of emotions, what is the measurement?

We are born with the same ingredients, why  not appreciate the endowment?

 Boy meets girl, girl meets boy and everything in between

Too emotional? That’s for people who don’t really know what it means…

Emotions, a sign of balance and being connected

Has been misconstrued as the opposite

Rarely appreciated or protected

And we wonder why men and women are disconnected

To be or not to be…Lets Be

Spiritual Detachment: The Misconception

Hard work spent understanding self

Overcoming the false identity  of physical wealth

Keen awareness of being led by the ego

The best path to walk is the path of letting go.

Not understood by most they boast in their own airing’s

Unaware beings confuse detachment  with nonchalant and non-caring

Its the furthest from the truth the great misconception

A Perception of non-emotional driven actions

Cannot be rocked by false lies and bad energy

Nor Past or future memories living only in the present moment

Acknowledgement of the highs and appreciation of the lows but keeping the forward movement

 Elevations that transcend the physical; the spiritual  requires release

Attachment is not to you or things but only to finding a greater peace

It is not about not caring or being nonchalant

Its about Understanding perspectives and relating

Respecting opinions and communicating

Loving people as they are and where they are

But placing ones peace of being first and foremost

This is the art of spiritual detachment.. its not for most

I’ve Been Using You…

I use you for my own pleasure…never for your own.

Minds will play tricks…. having you thinking someone finally threw you a bone

Feels good to you but feels better to me. I know the pleasure that I need.

You…the person of the moment.. simply happen to be the easiest way to give the beast its feed

I’ve been using you….

Intentionally doing so and not against your will.

I am not an evil person I just happen to know the deal

Voids unfulfilled….you and I both..cannot fill what we do not feel

I’ve been using you…

Stimulations of a degree but not of the highest….
.does my 3rd eye see? uncomfortable words unsaid

Lonely days and nights brings me closer to you…confusing because of what my actions have said

I don’t want to be here…feeling you…but I need to not be something ….i need not to be alone in my current state

impulsive decisions Sporadically clinging to randomly selected strangers who I feel nothing for.. ..but for a moment…fill a space

I’ve been using you….

Simulations of types of love…. momentarily blinding…hindering what I too know..we are not the winning loot

Ignorant I am not….but together we try to grow something …… but we are not of the same root

We only fit for a moment in the spectrum of false time….a day..a few hours at a time..we both know this to be true

Words unsaid, actions incomplete….voids unfulfilled..past decisions unforgiven…unable to love like we need…you have been using me and I’ve been using you…

Oh These Dreams

Dreams of us finally intertwined like a ball of rubber bands.

Connected on every level I see that our love can finally stand.

Memories of you leave the most vivid pictures in my mind.

I walk the thin red line of fantasy and reality sometimes they seem to be one of a kind.

In Any Case….

My heart races at a frantic pace whenever you are in my place of solitude

You do not force yourself into my lonely universe and for that you have my gratitude.

But like water falling on earths grounds, you seep into my roots, into my core.

And yet I can’t for the life of me seem to block it even after you told me what your boots were made for.

Nor do i want to so my dilemma will continue to remain like bacteria on human skin.

But it will not spread or grow from outside in but from within

And I allow this growth because I realize there is not a me without you( thats not true)

But this I know you knew

And even though we are through, our souls still manage to dance with the power of Gods.

Doing what we thought was impossible, giving love the approval nod.

Memories and dreams so strong I can taste the lipstick on your lips.

I can still feel the sway of your hips and the passion in your eyes.

Somehow you always managed to look right through my disguise.

Are these dreams just selling me a dream?

Giving me a false hope, a reality that is not even close to what it seems?

A wonderful dream and a nightmare in one.

For I know when I awake with the rising sun

I’ll be holding tight the pillow that catches my unheard tears.

And between all the thing that I fear

Loneliness stands alone

So i sleep much

wanting to feel that soft touch

that gives me goose bumps on my spleen

Oh how I love to hate these dreams

I know that I can’t continue to walk perfect on this balance beam.

I eventually must fall to aside….eventually I must pick a team.

On my left is the side to let you go and on my right is where I hold on tight.

I am use to walking in the middle because it was where I could see both within my sight.

oh these silly dreams of mine

Keep me locked up in no specific place or time

In a place where beautiful music is made by wind himes

And the art of lovemaking is study in various forms.

But most of all the art of loving one another is always performed.

oh these dreams, these dreams that communicate in a language that only my heart understands.

Always comes to an end much quicker than what I have planned.

Tomorrow will most a surely come and awake me, this I know is true

And no matter how hard I try to fight it…my body will awake as if on cue.

But even as I awake I could never stop dreaming of you……..

The Most Anonymous

The creator of life has decided to remain anonymous. No one knows the creators real name but it has been decided that we shall call her God.

As a strategist I decided to write my own synopsis about this. Because maybe we bestowed upon anonymous too much power that the creator never really desired.

I admire those who like to place everything on Anonymous and fervently believe that the creator rules with a firm rod. Approving or denying miracles as if a snob.

But I ask, what if God was never the plan? What if Gods name was simply Bob? Not to diminish the power of God but whats really the power in a name? Because maybe God was never the intention.

I should mention that by definition God means “being perfect in power, wisdom and goodness, ruler of the universe” says very little about creating life and Bob means Robert and Robert means bright fame. But maybe thats all the creator wanted….to be known.

Now don’t think me wrong, because I believe in the creation above me but I also believe in the creation all around me…the ultimate reality. Wise folks know that God is The I am. Which means God is whatever we need God to be.

So in a sense the creators name could be God but again what if it was just Bob?

I’m not afraid to question the unknown and I’m not ashamed to say I don’t know. But truthfully neither do any of you. We only know what we believe and beliefs don’t make facts.

So I refuse to place the creator of the universe in a box. I will not make the creator into a stereotype like the far right. And I will not say that creator doesn’t exist like the far left..in the middle if where I find sight.

To believe that the creator of the universe cares about what we do would be to ignore the obvious. Which makes me wonder? Was God really the intention of the creator of life? If we remember the definition and place our bias to the side…

Would God stop the genocides and homicides? Would God really choose a side? Would God continue to just let innocent people die? Maybe Bob would but God? Thats a shame but again whats the power in a name?

The creator of the universe has decided to remain anonymous. No one knows the creators real name but it has been decided that the creators name shall be God, but the conscious write their only synopsis.

Because maybe being God was never the idea, maybe it was never THE design. maybe we created our own image of God and evolved it over time.

Because the creator of life has decided to remain Anonymous we have placed our own expectations onto someone or something else.Its easier to look away than to look within..perspectives…I guess it just depends.

I’ve seen good and bad people pass away naturally still waiting for the messiah. But maybe that wasn’t the creator of life’s true desire….to liberate

Maybe the creator of life became lonely and simply wanted a friend.Maybe the creator of life was dying and decided that in an effort to not let all be lost…created its seed.

The truth is there is no way to know but what we believe is not a fact; in fact its a concept and a concept is merely a thought. If we think it does it make it true? If I said I think you’re God….one could only wonder

Are you?

Because see, the creator of life has decided to remain The Most Anonymous and allowed us to write our own synopsis about what or who God is. And I’m not trying to make your blood pressure throb.

All I’m saying is what about Bob? (Bright fame)

Mission accomplished