Where Growth Happens

2 Years Later:The Reflection

Slightly over 2 years ago I uprooted myself from all that I knew and moved from Richmond, Virginia to Clearwater, Florida and a year later I would move to Saint Petersburg, Fl.  It wasn’t a very easy decision by any means to leave Virginia and there were nights where I  would shed some tears in fear of not knowing what I was going to do. Before I made that move I had been feeling uneasy about the direction my life had been going in but wasn’t quite sure what to do about it. What I did know is that I was no longer happy with the situation I had found myself in.

I had spent ten years doing a job that I truly enjoyed and felt that I could see myself doing for awhile. However between 2009-2010 a major shift in this perspective happened. I no longer felt the same way about the company I was working for and the industry as well. And in 2011 I was fired by my job. You see; I felt under appreciated and not respected by the company and it started to show in my body language and my work ethic and what I realize now is that when a person no longer feels appreciated by someone or something that you give your all for, it can  flip your entire world upside down. Makes you feel not good enough and makes you want to get as far away as possible because of it.

This is why most people tend to move from one place to another. Because the easiest thing to do  is to create distant between you and whatever has hurt your ego/feelings. This is what happened to me and I needed to go. I should say that its important to not base an entire move on the under appreciation feeling from the job. For me it was a combination of that, no job and the difficulty from leaving a woman alone.  But that didn’t make the decision any easier to do and I tried to find many reasons or excuses to stay right there in Richmond, Virginia even though every ounce of me yearned to get away.

So I created that distant between work and also the pain in love that I had going on. I sold all that I had other than the bare minimums and moved. But I moved with a plan of action.

  1. Get out of the health and fitness Industry(Find a new job)
  2. Get my own place (again)
  3. Start working on rebuilding my credit
  4. Get back in school
  5. Find Love
  6. Publish at least 1 book

These were my goals 2 years ago when I turned 30 years old and knew I was starting over. Once I committed to the move I said my good byes and was able to get my mind around the fact that this was happening. As of right now I’m 2.5 out of 6 on these goals but the main reason is I never accounted for how hard it would be for me to complete goal #1. It took 1.5 years to find a new job and I couldn’t move out by myself with an unsteady paycheck. But 5 days from now I’ll be moving into my own place and I’m checking off these goals (no matter how slow).

Goal #4 will be happening in 2014 now that things are getting more settled. It has been a very difficult time trying to make these things happen but thankfully I have met some good people who were able to help me along the way and I will always be there for them because of that. Its a 2 year reflection and I can see where I’m going.

Its a great feeling to see these goals happening and very excited about what the future now holds for myself. I’m never afraid to reflect on whats going on in my life or to admit what needs to be changed and to either let go of it or go full steam ahead at attracting it into my life. If we never reflect upon or life and take responsibility for what does and doesn’t exist our lives we will never get where we need to (at least not with peace).

The age of the Aquarius is believed to be happening right now and I’m not sure if it is or not (I’ll leave that to people more experienced than I) but with me being an Aquarius I can say that 2013 has been a great year for me. The best since I’ve been here. I’m excited about 2014 because I’m still growing tremendously and spiritual understanding of life has been beautiful.

I’m pretty confident that goal #4 and #6 will be happening in 2014 and for that I smile. I smile a lot in my life because I’m happy with the man I am and the better man I’m becoming. Its interesting how we become complacent in certain situations in our lives because some things haven’t happened the way we want or expect but I’ve realized that we can stay complacent and go against the change that is inevitable or we can reflect on our lives and go with the flow of change if we know in every ounce of our spirit that its needed.

I stopped going against it in 2011 and its been a peaceful ride.

3 Responses »

  1. I could not read your post and then not comment, so I thought I would share my thoughts. Your post is very inspiring to me, because you speak on similar experiences that has led me on my own journey that I consider to be a faith walk, often times we stumble across many things that gives us vision, understanding, & awareness on our own situations and it brings us to realization that we’re not alone in this world. I really appreciate your honesty and openness to share part of your life. My problem is the fear to release my struggles and thoughts especially when they hold so much pain! Leaving behind the things that are familiar and starting over is hard in the beginning, but when our focus remains on our goals, our results become manifestation of our change, spirit, love, and determination. … If that makes any sense! Nice to meet you!

    • I’ve learned that its best to live a life in openness as much as possible because we all can benefit from one another. When we realize that we all are connected it makes it easier to understand that we can never be alone. We all go through nearly identical situations in life just at different times. That pain that you are holding on to does not create any peace within yourself. We have to remember that the pain was simply an experience(choice) that we brought into our lives. It wasn’t meant to remain with us the entire time. Before you can forgive others for their part in it you must forgive and move for yourself. We have to let that fear go and its not as simple as just saying I no longer fear it. The fear will appear less when we start truly believing that we deserve anything that we need. You have already made the toughest decision and thats acknowledging that enough is enough AND you made the 2nd decision to do something about it. No matter how hard the rest is it will not compare to those two steps..just takes determination.

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